Archive for the ‘ Love ’ Category
Inhale. Life flows through me; something awakens within, something ephemeral and barely tangible. It almost doesn’t register on my consciousness. My heartbeat skips and flutters, something tickles my mind. Exhale. Synapses fire, my pulse is pounding in my mind like drumbeats. Drums, drums in the deep. Inhale. I cannot find words. There are none. I [ READ MORE ]
Insomnia. When you have insomnia you’re never really asleep but you’re never really awake either. I don’t sleep well, I never have. I don’t keep what one might call regular hours and I’ve learned to function productively on very little rest. Sometimes, just sometimes, I can sleep for more than a few hours at a [ READ MORE ]
A conclusion has been drawn and redrawn among the people that know best, and that conclusion is that I do not feel feelings. This is more or less true at most times. For a large part of my life I had thought that feelings were a weakness (how very Sith of me, I know) but [ READ MORE ]
Призрак means ‘ghost’ in Russian. Pronounced: prizrak Sometimes I feel like one. Especially as I have truly begun to be able to let those little stressors, and the big ones, go. The ability to consciously choose what matters and what does not, to let what does not just slide by without feeling it. Ghosting through [ READ MORE ]
I’ve got my hand on the rail, holding on so hard my fingers are cramping, my grip – so seemingly sure – begins to slip. <[ READ MORE ]
Over the course of this month I have deleted far too many posts before they could become entries. I find myself not only editing my novel, but revising my thoughts before they can be set down in what passes for digital stone here at WordPress. The days that flow backward behind me start to make [ READ MORE ]
I had a thought while reading through all of your comments on various posts of mine – you know who you are. In fact, there aren’t that many of you, so were I not so lazy I’d just dig around and copy all of your names into this post…buuuuuut I am that lazy tonight so [ READ MORE ]
I lean in my doorway, staring out into the inky blackness of the night. I can feel the doorframe pulsing against my shoulder, as though the beats of my heart were somehow shaking the very foundations of the earth. The thoughts running through my mind incoherent, a texture of slight madness. A confusion of my [ READ MORE ]
…and the crowded room receded back, the music and laughter; stilted conversations droning down into a low babble. She looked down and said, “I know I said I don’t feel things like normal people do, but I really like you and I’m afraid I’m going to break your heart, or that you will break mine.” [ READ MORE ]
I can feel something stirring, deep inside of me. Something I no longer thought I was capable of. Something that I had, in my infinite naïveté, believed was dead. I cannot explain it, I suppose that these things just happen. I think it has been buried in my subconscious for months now. Waiting like a [ READ MORE ]
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