Rudyard’s Yard

“Don’t talk of worlds that never were, the end is all that’s ever true. There’s nothing you can ever say, nothing you can ever do.”
– the cure

It’s been an odd few weeks. I find myself pulled south, far south to the gulf. I wonder if it is just my natural wanderlust kicking in or if there is something more waiting on the coast. I miss the saline tears of ocean spray on my face, surely, as much as I miss believing in a dream.

I often think that perhaps I think more than is good for me. But for some reason I cannot quite grasp I find my thoughts constantly turning toward the sun and sand of Louisiana. The swamp and the river compete for my attention in my dreams. I remember the smell of the jungles of my boyhood and often wake with a slight upturn to my lips, a curving smile that actually reaches my eyes.

The jungle has a smell/sound that will forever be imprinted in my mind, whenever it rains in the summer I am suddenly in central-american rainforest, wondering-wandering through my earliest years.

Omnia Causa Fiunt.

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  1. The other day I was contemplating what to do with my ‘free’ weekend. I rarely get a weekend with absolutely no children and for some oddly beautiful reason, it happened. The sad part of it is that for the life of me, I had trouble trying to come up with something great to do. Finish my painting, enjoy the peace and quiet…and then out of the blue, it hit me; drive down to the coast. I have no idea why but it seemed like the answer to all of life’s problems.

    Then I found myself looking forward to fall…aka canoe season. 🙂 And I stated, matter of factly, that I would be going to Louisiana to canoe down a bayou. There is no other place (that I’ve been to yet) that quite compares to the way that place affects me.

    • It’s becoming a real possibility that I’ll be moving south fairly soon. I’m not certain when, but my feelings on the idea are somewhat mixed. As always, but something about the idea pulls at me, pulls in ways I’d thought had left me long ago.

      I rather like that.

  2. Yeah…
    I know what you mean. I feel the pull too and the more I think about it, the more appealing it is. I don’t know what your situation is or what you’re weighing but I love that you like that feeling. I think you should go.

    • Thanks for the encouragement! I always try to understand gut feelings, my instincts are usually pretty solid, I’ve just got this feeling that I’m supposed to go. And I enjoy those sorts of moments, they’re somewhat rare I think.

  3. Ooh…now I’m even more intrigued and excited for you! Gut feelings ARE there for a reason. I know every time I’ve ignored mine, I’ve ended up regretting it.

    This conversation along with my own recent longings prompted me to text The Ex and ask what he thought about moving to the coast. He wants to move out of the country though, like to Ecuador, but I have another child with another Ex so I can’t really do that. But he said, “Sure, I’ll move! Pick the place and arrange it with First Ex and we’ll go in a month.” But he doesn’t want brown water so he suggested Florida. I dunno…sounds nice though.

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