As I type this I’m driving south down SR 7. Thinking. Thinking about life. The events that stand out in my mind like a neon marquee.

The choices I’ve made, the things I’ve done to survive everything the world has thrown at me.

I’ve said this before but it seems unusually close to the surface today. I’ve made the conscious decision to never let the past affect the future negatively.

Theres always time to reinvent yourself, to begin again-instead of starting over. It’s all about how you choose to perceive your life and, more importantly, yourself.

Side note: I’m currently singing Dub FX’s “Love Me Or Not” at the top of my lungs. The car is the only place you will catch me singing, soberly anyway.

Side side note: I’m quite impressed that my facility with languages and accents allows me to sing with a cockney accent.

Back to my stream of thought. I seem to spend a lot of my free time introspectively.

And back once again about fourteen hours later.

I probably shouldn’t blog while driving, just a thought.

You know something? I think that I’m actually way too tired to finish this post, so I’m going to do a ryanmccracken.org first:

To be continued…

*I actually fell asleep before I could upload this last night, there’s tired for ya.

    • ellielawson
    • October 12th, 2011

    Is it really as simple as deciding to be a certain way? You don’t think you had it in you from the beginning? I’m not doubting you, just reflecting on my own inability to prevent the past interfering in my future.

    • I believe that it is. It takes effort and mindfulness but you can do it. Just make positive thought a conscious habit. After a while, that new you that you’ve created becomes the you that you always are, without thought or purpose. You just become that person you imagined you should be. You will always remember the painful things that are so difficult to get past, but they will lose their power to affect you the way they once did.

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