Posts Tagged ‘ postaday2012 ’

Mis(s)

I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.

Fierce

I like the word ferocious, ferocity, fierce.

It’s a great descriptor when used properly.

I am fiercely living my ferocious life with an unbridled ferocity. Ergo, fierce.

Tangents

My musical tastes (which have always been rather odd and eclectic) have been going in strange directions lately.

I rather like it. Horizons, consider yourselves broadened.

I’m not sleeping well again. Odd dreams populate my subconscious continuously.

I sit, on my steps, the three-a.m. sky cold and bright with stars. They are blurred halos shimmering over the rims of the corrective lenses I rarely wear.

The night sky is a place dreams; aspirations that shine alongside the constellations of our forebears.

I stare, and shiver. My thoughts running tangentially, leading me ever-onward toward . . . nothing.

The steam of my breath heads skyward and my concentration, filmy and indistinct goes with it.

I feel as if I must be waiting for something. I cannot fathom what it might be.

Eurisko

Eurisko means I discover in Greek. It feels fitting to start a post with that idea.

I wish life could be more focused on the journey, the discovery, instead of the things that seem to be most important to modern civilization.

Gandhi said be the change you want to see.

I have found that it is difficult to be the change when it seems like your voice barely registers. My signal is lost in the ‘verse.

I would like to note here that as soon as I typed Gandhi’s name my shuffle went to Chaiyya Chaiyya from the Dil Se soundtrack.

Auspicious, no?

I’m currently sitting on my steps, giant cup of espresso in hand, staring into a gloriously blue winter sky. I dislike winter principally because it’s normally so gray. All of the color leached from the landscape, cold and barren.

It’s a season that I’ve never become accustomed to. I became self-aware in Central America, the most formative moments of my boyhood spent in the oceans and jungles of Panama. As such, I dislike intensely the cold of much of North America.

There are many things that we are forced to accept in this life. Chance and circumstance serve to circumscribe our existence.

I’ve never become accustomed to limitations either. I will not, can not, rest on past laurels; may I never be forced to lower my grasp from the stars. Nothing worthwhile comes easily or without price. That’s the nature of life, of our lives, we all must pay for the things we want, in some way or other.

Price. When does it become too much?

When does the cost of discovery become too much to be borne?

Mortals, we are.

Sometimes I wonder if I will ever run out of things to say.

I sincerely hope not, because that would mean that I’ve become deficient in some manner or other.

I’m feeling reflective tonight, my great-uncle died in the morning of what is now yesterday. I think that a death makes everyone stop and take stock of what’s truly important.

I’m not certain that it’s sunk in yet. I feel, well that’s just it; I don’t know what to feel.

Should I say that I feel decidedly mortal? That I’m sad? That I cannot for the life within me think of something to say to my grandmother?

I think that sometimes the nature of the lives we lead is infinitely unfair.

I think I’ll just leave it at that.

Def(ine)[d]

Sometimes the moments that challenge us the most come to define us.

A physical and mental struggle, you’re going to have hiccups, you’re going to hit rough patches.

When you cross that finish line, no matter how slow or fast, it will change your life forever.

Yep, I’m talking about running marathons. A marathon. A marathoner.

Me.

Realities

“She was cheating on me, ripped a hole in me through which you could see tiny angels weeping.”

– Weeds

I like that quote, last year on this day I had an eerie feeling, a not-quite suspicion that something like that was looming. I was right.

Sometimes being right isn’t much fun, but my life has improved immeasurably since that day.

In other news my twenty-twelve marathon-training shoe decision has been made:

20120101-220824.jpg

My Nike tweet-pledge:

(@rymclovin)
1/1/12 7:29 PM
I will: Run more. Run harder. Run longer. Run stronger. Run as if my life depends on it. Because it does. #MAKEITCOUNT http://nike.com/makeitcount

Calendrical

Why exactly do we celebrate the first day of a new year? I get the idea of a clean slate, new beginning, fresh start…etc. It’s just another year. Not much really changes, but it’s a national holiday and election day isn’t. Personally I think that election day should be a national holiday and that every eligible voter should be excused from work for at least the time it takes to go participate in democracy.

That’s just me though.

As for the flood of resolutions; I don’t make new year’s resolutions. If I find something that I feel I need to change I don’t save it up for the first. I just make the changes I need, then and there.

Don’t get me wrong, I like the idea that people can make positive changes in their lives, it’s just that something about the whole resolution system that smacks of commercialism and manipulation to me.

Maybe I’m a bit more cynical than I need to be. There’s something I can work on.

Happy 2012.